The Great Garden Gnome Massacre
The Great Garden Gnome Massacre
The Great Garden Gnome Massacre
The Great Garden Gnome Massacre
The Great Garden Gnome Massacre
The Great Garden Gnome Massacre
The Great Garden Gnome Massacre
The Great Garden Gnome Massacre
The Great Garden Gnome Massacre
The Great Garden Gnome Massacre
The Great Garden Gnome Massacre
The Great Garden Gnome Massacre
The Great Garden Gnome Massacre
The Great Garden Gnome Massacre
The Great Garden Gnome Massacre
The Great Garden Gnome Massacre

The Great Garden Gnome Massacre

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A bunch of idiots got drunk in the garden, woke up the monsters, and now they're responsible for their actions.
"Save me, I'm going to be swallowed!"
"Give me your hand!"
"It was a mistake!"
"Oh no! We need a brilliant idea!"
"I'm going to be crushed to death! Hurry up and do something!"

This “Great Garden Gnome Massacre” lawn ornament might be the greatest lawn ornament of all time.

  • Each of these are carefully uniquely made 
  • Handmade
  • A lovely gift for dwarf lovers.
  • Global shipping

The Great Garden Gnome Massacre makes a great and hilarious gift for the garden lover in your life. The terrifying T-Rex is a defender of humanity with a taste for gnomes, a funny take on the conventional garden gnome. It’s a fun addition to any landscaping, but looks great in your home, garden or office, too. 12-inches tall; Made of durable cast poly resin to withstand the elements.

MONEY BACK GUARANTEE

We want you to be 100% satisfied with the products you buy from us. If for ANY reason you are not satisfied with your purchase, we offer an iron-clad money-back guarantee.

Buying online can be a daunting task, so we want you to realize that there are absolutely ZERO risks in buying something and trying it out. If you don’t like it, we’ll make it right… It’s our promise!

/** @private {string} */ class SpzCustomAnchorScroll extends SPZ.BaseElement { static deferredMount() { return false; } constructor(element) { super(element); /** @private {Element} */ this.scrollableContainer_ = null; } isLayoutSupported(layout) { return layout == SPZCore.Layout.LOGIC; } buildCallback() { this.viewport_ = this.getViewport(); this.initActions_(); } setTarget(containerId, targetId) { this.containerId = '#' + containerId; this.targetId = '#' + targetId; } scrollToTarget() { const container = document.querySelector(this.containerId); const target = container.querySelector(this.targetId); const {scrollTop} = container; const eleOffsetTop = this.getOffsetTop_(target, container); this.viewport_ .interpolateScrollIntoView_( container, scrollTop, scrollTop + eleOffsetTop ); } initActions_() { this.registerAction( 'scrollToTarget', (invocation) => this.scrollToTarget(invocation?.caller) ); this.registerAction( 'setTarget', (invocation) => this.setTarget(invocation?.args?.containerId, invocation?.args?.targetId) ); } /** * @param {Element} element * @param {Element} container * @return {number} * @private */ getOffsetTop_(element, container) { if (!element./*OK*/ getClientRects().length) { return 0; } const rect = element./*OK*/ getBoundingClientRect(); if (rect.width || rect.height) { return rect.top - container./*OK*/ getBoundingClientRect().top; } return rect.top; } } SPZ.defineElement('spz-custom-anchor-scroll', SpzCustomAnchorScroll); const STRENGTHEN_TRUST_URL = "/api/strengthen_trust/settings"; class SpzCustomStrengthenTrust extends SPZ.BaseElement { constructor(element) { super(element); this.renderElement_ = null; } isLayoutSupported(layout) { return layout == SPZCore.Layout.CONTAINER; } buildCallback() { this.xhr_ = SPZServices.xhrFor(this.win); const renderId = this.element.getAttribute('render-id'); SPZCore.Dom.waitForChild( document.body, () => !!document.getElementById(renderId), () => { this.renderElement_ = SPZCore.Dom.scopedQuerySelector( document.body, `#${renderId}` ); if (this.renderElement_) { this.render_(); } this.registerAction('track', (invocation) => { this.track_(invocation.args); }); } ); } render_() { this.fetchData_().then((data) => { if (!data) { return; } SPZ.whenApiDefined(this.renderElement_).then((apis) => { apis?.render(data); document.querySelector('#strengthen-trust-render-1718252090972').addEventListener('click',(event)=>{ if(event.target.nodeName == 'A'){ this.track_({type: 'trust_content_click'}); } }) }); }); } track_(data = {}) { const track = window.sa && window.sa.track; if (!track) { return; } track('trust_enhancement_event', data); } parseJSON_(string) { let result = {}; try { result = JSON.parse(string); } catch (e) {} return result; } fetchData_() { return this.xhr_ .fetchJson(STRENGTHEN_TRUST_URL) .then((responseData) => { if (!responseData || !responseData.data) { return null; } const data = responseData.data; const moduleSettings = (data.module_settings || []).reduce((result, moduleSetting) => { return result.concat(Object.assign(moduleSetting, { logos: (moduleSetting.logos || []).map((item) => { return moduleSetting.logos_type == 'custom' ? this.parseJSON_(item) : item; }) })); }, []); return Object.assign(data, { module_settings: moduleSettings, isEditor: window.self !== window.top, }); }); } } SPZ.defineElement('spz-custom-strengthen-trust', SpzCustomStrengthenTrust);
class SpzSmartBlockComponent extends SPZ.BaseElement { constructor(element) { super(element); this.templates_ = null; this.container_ = null; this.i18n_ = {}; this.config_ = {}; this.show_type_ = 3; this.product_resource_id_ = ''; this.collection_resource_id_ = ''; this.cart_items_ = []; this.customer_id_ = ''; this.order_id_ = ''; } static deferredMount() { return false; } isLayoutSupported(layout) { return layout == SPZCore.Layout.CONTAINER; } buildCallback() { const template_type = window.SHOPLAZZA.meta.page.template_type; if (template_type === 1) { this.show_type_ = 3; this.product_resource_id_ = window.SHOPLAZZA.meta.page.resource_id; } else if (template_type === 2) { this.show_type_ = 4; this.collection_resource_id_ = window.SHOPLAZZA.meta.page.resource_id; } else if (template_type === 15){ this.show_type_ = 5; } else if (template_type === 13){ this.show_type_ = 6; } else if (template_type === 20){ this.show_type_ = 7; this.customer_id_ = window.SHOPLAZZA.customer.customer_id; } else if (template_type === 35){ this.show_type_ = 8; this.order_id_ = window.location.pathname.split('/').pop(); } this.templates_ = SPZServices.templatesForDoc(this.element); this.setAction_(); } mountCallback() { console.log('smart mounted'); const that = this; const themeName = window.SHOPLAZZA.theme.merchant_theme_name; const isGeek = /Geek/.test(themeName); this.fetchRules().then((res) => { if (res && res.rules && res.rules.length) { const blockEl = document.getElementById('smart_recommend_block'); SPZ.whenApiDefined(blockEl).then((api) => { api.render({data: res}, true).then(() => { if (isGeek && that.show_type_ === 6) { blockEl.querySelector('.plugin_container_wrpper').style.padding = '30px 0'; } const recommendStyle = document.createElement('style'); recommendStyle.innerHTML = ` .plugin__recommend_container,.app-recommend-card { display: none !important; } `; document.head.appendChild(recommendStyle); const fetchList = []; res.rules.forEach((rule) => { fetchList.push(this.fetchRuleProductList(rule.id)); }); const fetchAll = Promise.all(fetchList); fetchAll.then((p_res) => { res.rules.forEach((rule, index) => { rule.products = p_res[index] && p_res[index].products; const ruleEl = document.getElementById('smart_recommend_rule_' + rule.id); SPZ.whenApiDefined(ruleEl).then((api) => { api.render({data: rule}, true).then(() => { that.impressListen(`#smart_recommend_rule_ul_${rule.id}`, function(){ that.trackRuleImpress(rule); }); const btnElList = document.querySelectorAll(`#smart_recommend_rule_ul_${rule.id} button`); btnElList.forEach((btnEl) => { if (btnEl && rule.config && rule.config.quick_shop_button_bg_color && rule.config.quick_shop_button_text_color) { btnEl.style.backgroundColor = rule.config.quick_shop_button_bg_color; btnEl.style.color = rule.config.quick_shop_button_text_color; } }) }); }); }); }); }) }) } else { if (window.top !== window.self) { const template_type = window.SHOPLAZZA.meta.page.template_type; const holderEl = document.getElementById('smart_recommend_preview_no_data_placeholder'); SPZ.whenApiDefined(holderEl).then((api) => { api.render({data: { isCart: template_type === 13, isCollection: template_type === 2, isProduct: template_type === 1, isIndex: template_type === 15 }}, true); }); } } }); } setAction_() { this.registerAction('quickShop', (data) => { const that = this; const product_id = data.args.product_id; const productIndex = data.args.productIndex; const rule_id = data.args.rule_id; const ssp = data.args.ssp; const scm = data.args.scm; const cfb = data.args.cfb; const ifb = data.args.ifb; const modalRender = document.getElementById('smart_recommend_product_modal_render'); if (product_id) { this.fetchProductData(product_id).then((res) => { const product = res.products && res.products.length && res.products[0] || {}; product.cfb = cfb; product.ifb = ifb; SPZ.whenApiDefined(modalRender).then((api) => { api.render({product: product, productIndex: productIndex, rule_id: rule_id, ssp: ssp, scm: scm, show_type: that.show_type_}, true).then(() => { const modalEl = document.getElementById('smart_recommend_product_modal'); SPZ.whenApiDefined(modalEl).then((modal) => { that.impressListen('#smart_recommend_product_modal', function(){ that.trackQuickShop({ rule_id: rule_id, product_id: product_id }); }); modal.open(); }); const formEl = document.getElementById('smart_recommend_product_form'); SPZ.whenApiDefined(formEl).then((form) => { form.setProduct(product); }); const variantEl = document.getElementById('smart_recommend_product_variants'); SPZ.whenApiDefined(variantEl).then((variant) => { variant.handleRender(product); }); }); }) }); } }); this.registerAction('handleScroll', (data) => { this.directTo(data.args.rule_id, data.args.direction); }); this.registerAction('handleProductChange', (data) => { const variant = data.args.data.variant; const product = data.args.data.product; const imageRenderEl = document.getElementById('smart_recommend_product_image'); SPZ.whenApiDefined(imageRenderEl).then((api) => { api.render({ variant: variant, product: product }, true); }); }); this.registerAction('handleAtcSuccess', (detail) => { const data = detail.args; data.data.product = data.data.product || {}; data.data.variant = data.data.variant || {}; const product_id = data.data.product.id; const product_title = data.data.product.title; const variant_id = data.data.variant.id; const price = data.data.variant.price; const rule_id = data.rule_id; const aid = `smart_recommend.${this.show_type_}.${rule_id}`; const ifb = data.data.product.ifb; const cfb = data.data.product.cfb; const ssp = data.ssp; const scm = data.scm; const spm = `smart_recommend_${this.show_type_}.${data.spmIndex}`; const params = { id: product_id, product_id: product_id, number: 1, name: product_title, variant_id: variant_id, childrenId: variant_id, item_price: price, source: 'add_to_cart', _extra: { aid: aid, ifb: ifb, cfb: cfb, scm: scm, spm: `..${window.SHOPLAZZA.meta.page.template_name}.${spm}`, ssp: ssp, } }; this.tranckAddToCart(params); }); this.registerAction('addATCHook', (data) => { const params = data.args; const spm = `smart_recommend_${this.show_type_}.${params.spmIndex}`; this.myInterceptor_ = window.djInterceptors && window.djInterceptors.track.use({ event: 'dj.addToCart', params: { aid: `smart_recommend.${this.show_type_}.` + params.rule_id, ssp: params.ssp, scm: params.scm, cfb: params.cfb, spm: `..${window.SHOPLAZZA.meta.page.template_name}.${spm}`, }, once: true }); }); } tranckAddToCart(detail) { if (window.$) { window.$(document.body).trigger('dj.addToCart', detail); } } fetchRules() { const payload = { show_type: this.show_type_, }; let that = this; if (this.show_type_ === 6) { let line_items = []; return this.fetchCart().then((res) => { if (res && res.cart && res.cart.line_items) { line_items = res.cart.line_items.map((item) => { return { product_id: item.product_id, variant_id: item.variant_id, quantity: item.quantity, price: item.price } }); } payload.line_items = line_items; that.cart_items_ = line_items; return that.fetchRulesRequest(payload); }); } else { if (this.show_type_ === 3) { payload.line_items = [{ product_id: this.product_resource_id_ }]; } else if (this.show_type_ === 4) { payload.collection_id = this.collection_resource_id_; } else if (this.show_type_ === 7) { payload.customer_id = this.customer_id_; } else if (this.show_type_ === 8) { payload.order_id = this.order_id_; } return this.fetchRulesRequest(payload); } } fetchRulesRequest(payload) { return fetch(window.SHOPLAZZA.routes.root + "/api/possum/recommend_query", { method: "POST", headers: { "Content-Type": "application/json" }, body: JSON.stringify(payload) }).then(function(res){ if(res.ok){ return res.json(); } }); } fetchCart() { return fetch(`/api/cart/cart-select?r=${Math.random().toString(36).slice(-4)}`) .then((res) => { if (res.ok) { return res.json(); } }); } fetchRuleProductList(rule_id) { const payload = { page: 1, limit: 100, fields: ["title", "url", "image", "min_price_variant.price", "min_price_variant.compare_at_price"], rule_id: rule_id, }; if (this.show_type_ === 3) { payload.line_items = [{ product_id: this.product_resource_id_ }]; } else if (this.show_type_ === 4) { payload.collection_id = this.collection_resource_id_; } else if (this.show_type_ === 6) { payload.line_items = this.cart_items_; } else if (this.show_type_ === 7) { payload.customer_id = this.customer_id_; } else if (this.show_type_ === 8) { payload.order_id = this.order_id_; } return fetch(window.SHOPLAZZA.routes.root + "/api/possum/recommend_products", { method: "POST", headers: { "Content-Type": "application/json" }, body: JSON.stringify(payload) }).then(function(res){ if(res.ok){ return res.json(); } }).catch(function(err){ console.log(err); }); } fetchProductData(product_id) { return fetch(window.SHOPLAZZA.routes.root + "/api/possum/products", { method: "POST", headers: { "Content-Type": "application/json" }, body: JSON.stringify({ product_ids: [product_id], fields: [ "images", "options", "min_price_variant", "variants"] }) }).then(function(res){ if(res.ok){ return res.json(); } }).catch(function(err){ console.log(err); const loadingEl = document.getElementById('smart_recommend_loading'); if (loadingEl) { loadingEl.style.display = 'none'; } }); } getStyle(ele, style) { if (!ele) return; if (window.getComputedStyle) { return window.getComputedStyle(ele)[style]; } return ele.currentStyle[style]; } directTo(id, direction) { const scrollElement = document.getElementById(`smart_recommend_rule_ul_${id}`); const blockWidth = parseInt(this.getStyle(scrollElement, 'width')); const scrollLength = (blockWidth * 0.19 - 12) * 5; const scrollPoint = scrollElement.scrollWidth - scrollElement.clientWidth; if (!scrollElement) return; if (direction === 'left') { if (document.dir === 'rtl') { scrollElement.scrollTo({ left: Math.abs(scrollElement.scrollLeft) >= scrollPoint - 100 ? 0 : scrollElement.scrollLeft - scrollLength, behavior: 'smooth' }); return; } scrollElement.scrollTo({ left: Math.max(scrollElement.scrollLeft - scrollLength, 0), behavior: 'smooth' }); } else { if (document.dir === 'rtl') { scrollElement.scrollTo({ left: Math.abs(scrollElement.scrollLeft) >= scrollPoint + 100 ? 0 : scrollElement.scrollLeft + scrollLength, behavior: 'smooth' }); return; } scrollElement.scrollTo({ left: scrollElement.scrollLeft >= scrollPoint - 100 ? 0 : scrollElement.scrollLeft + scrollLength, behavior: 'smooth' }); } } trackRuleImpress(rule) { if (window.sa && window.sa.track) { window.sa.track("plugin_common", { plugin_name: "upsell", event_type: "impressions", rule_id: rule.id, ssp: rule.ssp, scm: rule.scm, show_type: this.show_type_, support_app_block: window.SHOPLAZZA.theme.support_app_block }); window.sa.track("module_impressions", { aid: `smart_recommend.${this.show_type_}.${rule.id}`, support_app_block: window.SHOPLAZZA.theme.support_app_block }); } } trackQuickShop(data) { window.sa && sa.track && sa.track("plugin_common", { plugin_name: "upsell", event_type: "quick_shop", rule_id: data.rule_id, product_id: data.product_id, show_type: this.show_type_, }); } impressListen(selector, cb) { const el = document.querySelector(selector); const onImpress = (e) => { if (e) { e.stopPropagation(); } cb(); }; if (el && !el.getAttribute('imprsd')) { el.addEventListener('impress', onImpress) } else if (el) { onImpress(); } } } SPZ.defineElement('spz-custom-smart-block', SpzSmartBlockComponent);